Look, I love soccer. The athleticism. The tension. The explosion of excitement when someone scores a goal. It’s pretty great. I mean there’s a reason why it’s the most popular sport in the world (until basketball inevitably passes it of course). I’ve never once thought, hey soccer could be better.!At least I never thought that until today. And that’s because NFL star, new Raider, and all-around American treasure Marshawn Lynch took to the pitch this weekend and taught us all about what soccer could be.
You have to wear cleats. Who needs them?! You’re not allowed to use your hands. Who says?! Who made you my boss?! If you break the rules they’ll give you a red card. Yeah right, I’m terrified of your little piece of red plastic. That will definitely keep me in line. No question.
Now sure is Beast Mode’s version of the game unconventional? Unquestionably. But does that mean that it’s not entertaining? Of course it doesn’t. Thus far there has been no word as to whether or not FIFA plans to implement any or all of Marshawn’s proposed changes in advance of the next World Cup, but I think I speak for everyone when I say that it’s hopefully a matter of “when,” not “if.”