So, you’re finally ready to start a family. But how many romps between the sheets guarantee a baby nine months later?
Perhaps, twenty times?
Got you thinking, hasn’t it? Now, for those of you who were possibly denied sex education and are still quite, well, naïve as to the implications and risks of all things sex – let’s get some facts straight. Just one sexual encounter is enough to potentially create a tiny human. Bonus fun fact? A white stork doesn’t deliver the baby to your doorstep. Also, what are you doing here? Go do your homework!
So, let me rephrase my earlier question, how many sexual encounters must a couple have on average before finally conceiving? The answer, according to a recent study, is a staggering 78 times!
A British parenting channel by the name of Channel Mum, recently conducted a survey where they questioned 1,194 parents just how many lovemaking sessions did they require before welcoming a child of their own. On an average scale, the everyday couple required to engage in sexual intercourse 13 times a month over a six-month course before they finally met with success.
Who Said 13 Was Unlucky?
“Far from being an unlucky number, 13 seems to be the lucky number couples need each month to fall pregnant”, says Siobhan Freegard, founder of Channel Mum.
Now, let’s be honest with each other. You surely guessed a lower number, didn’t you? I know I did. And I definitely lay the blame on every ill-fated one-night stand movie I’ve had the misfortune of watching. Besides love-at-first-sight and long distance relationships actually working out (Ha!), instant pregnancy is another unrealistic expectation Hollywood has driveled out. Which can be rather frustrating for hopeful couples.
If you’re struggling to conceive, then don’t be too disheartened for you aren’t alone. It’s only a measly 5% of the population surveyed that actually reported getting pregnant after just one sexual encounter.
Furthermore, it was only a third of the couples that actually got pregnant in their first attempted month. Additionally, close to 20% of couples on minimum took an entire year to finally conceive.
Fertility is just a tricky business. From second-hand smoke exposure levels to the amount of stress you’re battling, there is a multitude of factors that influence your chances of getting pregnant. Hence, if you haven’t yet been successful after 5-6 months of actively trying, don’t be alarmed. The aforementioned study suggests that’s absolutely normal.
But Can I Somehow Increase My Odds?
The following are a list of the most insightful pointers that happened to surface in the study from couples who have successfully conceived after several tries. Read on to discover how you too could potentially stack those odds in you and your partner’s favor.
1. Yes, Quantity Matters
A staggering 50% of successful couples admitted to having sex much more frequently when attempting to conceive. Hence, if you and you partner are in the habit of initiating lovemaking when it hits your fancy, you need to up your game. Scheduling sexy-time may sound rather unromantic, but hey, it works!
2. Spice Things Up!
Only 1/3rd of the surveyed mommies professed to enjoying increasing the frequency of their baby making fun. In contrast, 18% women admitted to finding the additional tries more like a chore.
Killing that spark of desire in your wedded lives is the nightmare every married couple dreads while trying to conceive. Prevent this by getting innovative. Some mommies revealed that to spice up their baby making fun they planned a vacation, much like having another honeymoon!
3. Understand Your Cycle
Frequent sex may not always seal the deal. At the end of the day, other than those few days of fertility, your odds of getting pregnant throughout the month are simply zero. Hence, it is vital you gain an understanding of your menstrual cycle and fertile window. Try using ovulation calendars online or download a menstrual cycle tracking app to make your baby-making-attempts count.
4. Support One Another
Freegard points out, “But while trying to conceive can be fun, it is also hard work, stressful and not every couple is lucky enough to conceive. So, while you’re focused on the baby, try to remember about each other, too.”
A whopping 43% of surveyed couples confided that failing to conceive made them feel pressured. Repeatedly unsuccessful pregnancy tests can take a toll on couples. Hence, it’s important you check in with each other through this arduous journey.
5. Missionary For The Winner
The question of the hour – which is the best sex position to conceive? Well, science tells us it’s the missionary, folks. In second place comes the doggy style.
Trying to conceive can be hard, and at times, disappointing and cumbersome. But, at the end of the day, don’t forget to enjoy each other. After all, baby making is just another name for lovemaking.
Emaan is a voracious and rather indiscriminate reader. She is also a writer, history buff, insomniac, amateur doodle artist, terrible poet and a self-professed philosopher (but only after 3 am). Currently, she is pursuing a degree in medicine.